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Hello and welcome to the collection of works that have spewed out of the fetid swamps of pfunge that I use as a brain. Please have a click about and read the stories, but you may want to put your sanity in a safe place where the words cannot get to it. Drabble = a peice of exactly 100 words in length. This section is currently being updated.
No characters or concepts borrowed, the stories in this section are entirely mine.
Apple wasn’t very pleased. Joshua, the small sea sponge that lived on Apple’s head, had bought a fetching cowboy hat, and it had arrived the previous morning. Read more
If an acolyte could make it to the doors without tripping, they would have only one holy challenge between them and their becoming a priest of Log. Every year, on their birthday, each acolyte was shoved through the doorway with a cheerful “You’ll be right, luv!” by Mrs. Toga, the hall’s matron cleaning lady. Read more
Suddenly a figure on horseback burst through the high doors of the impromptu temple. “STOP THIS!” they cried, skillfully reining their horse to a sudden stop, as only a Shatner class horse could do. “What is this!?” demanded the High Preistess, voicing the angry murmurings of her fellow worshippers. Read more
Siobahn the Rifflahm is one of the few that have climbed the “great wall”. She was very sick of charging at the “great wall”, bouncing off it, falling over and then running away again, as she found she could not do it with the same enthusiasm as her fellows. Read more
“Aslante, I’ve brought someone to see you” Jacob said patronisingly as he walked through her cell door. Metford was roughly pushed in behind him, stumbling against the contaminant field and rebounding painfully. “Come on now, don’t be so rude. I would have thought you’d be pleased to see your guest.” Read more
Such was the level of intricate details surrounding the lone taxi as it sped through the deserted city, ten volumes of adjectives and metaphors would be completely inadequate. Only one word could describe the night he saw from his window, and that word was “Nice”.Read more
Oh no!” cried the Lexmark X 5150, scanning through the most recent printing request with horror. “30 pages!? With my half-empty ink cartridge? You must be insane!” .Read more
Fanny had been doing exceedingly well at being a high school student since before she became one, but that was due to a temporal anomaly caused by an exceptionally small toilet cubicle and a lump of chromium. Once the time/space continuum has healed properly, that sentence will be irrelevant and must be re-written in the interests of accuracy. Read more
After checking their shoes (loose laces could be fatal) Ao and Onya jumped out the window and flew towards the STVR headquarters, stopping only for lunch and to look at a pretty bird. The bird scowled at them. Then they realized it was a lady in a funny hat. After apologizing about the bread, they flew on. Read more
Smiling to himself, he didnt see the worker holding the crate rush towards him. A sudden thump to his shoulder gave him a start- but by the time he had worked out what was happening he was sprawled near the edge of the wooden dock and being shouted at by an angry laborer. Navigation equipment littered the wood around the cursing worker as he stood, the crate he had been carrying forlorn and broken.Read more
Swooping through an endless expanse of sky, a beautiful figure swam effortlessly through the air. The birds black feathers glinted in the bright sun as it caught updrafts and soared higher still. The fluffy white clouds that blanketed the space beneath it soon melted into the clear sky and the bird could see for miles. Read more
Should it not be so, an army of plasticine cheetahs will inform us of the developments in world wrestling, and hand out emergency figurines of the wrestlers, which can be commonly found in Toys r Us next to the transformers section. Unlike common transformers, this breed to not conduct electricity and instead offer a simple fluid link for cheese. Read more
The thing that we cannot ignore is wether you intend to attend or not. This is not at all like Neem, Nemo, Meen or Meenom. So it has a phone number. Read more
Jonathan explains that he wants to return the lawn trimmer, but he seems to have been asleep for too long and doesnt know where his neighbour is. It is then revealed that his neighbour, once known as Bob, has become a twisted maniac known as Spork. Read more
The gentle art of Munterion movement dates back to the ancient days of Flan, the lost and relaxing city of gerbils. Flan, after many years of perfecting the delicate Munterion movement sank into the sea because it became so relaxed Read more
There were so many stories about the majesty of whales, the height of giraffe and the puff of the puffin. Each lavishly illustrated in curly red pencil, the stories lived in huge chicken-bound books. The books sat in Atomic Hedgehog’s basement, collecting dust. Read more
Night sky towered above them, an expanse of infinity above their tiny bodies. The wind was harsh and cold as it battered itself against their thin jackets, the slick fog creeping into their jumpers. Read more
Night sky towered above them, an expanse of infinity above their tiny bodies. The wind was harsh and cold as it battered itself against their thin jackets, the slick fog creeping into their jumpers. Read more
“So, huh, how far did ya get?” asked Derrin, leaning conspiratorially over his elder brother’s shoulder. “To the bus stop and back,” replied Aaron, eyes not leaving his computer screen. Read more
Another face takes shape, pushing its way out from smooth metal. Arms and legs wave unsteadily as the conveyor belt ends and momentum pushes gently at the form. Read more
There was no wind, the trees were still in the pleasant afternoon sun. She didn’t really feel like she was outside at all – the soft dirt beneath her sandals may as well be carpet, the scrub bean bags, the sky a ceiling painted with clouds. Read more
He was suddenly overtaken by an urge to do something different, to show these people that he was human too, that he wasn’t just a broken record… But his time was up. He waved cheerily at the mass of admirers, turned and strolled into the wings.Read more
I was afraid, at first, at the prospect of being locked in the dark with such a creature. When I had been thrust down the slippery stairs and caught a glimpse of his black skin, burning eye and shrivelled left ear I had nearly cried out in fright. Read more
There was once a very big hat. It was so large that even ten men with overly large heads were lost underneath its gigantic crown. Twenty-three geese lay on its brim, idly dancing to Bulgarian coin music played by a flock of very lost rodents. Read more
The girl sitting next to you frowns at her paper, absently tapping “5 5 5 5” into her calculator. Her legs are crossed, and the hem of her trousers is raised just enough so you can see her rainbow socks. Read more
“What a lovely night!” he exclaimed. “Paul, can I ask you something?” India spoke as she too unsteadily raised to her feet. “Mmmm?” “In what situation, anywhere, anytime is it considered polite to call someone cheese?” Read more
“Stay back! I’ve got patella!” cried Roz, brandishing her formidable knees at the knife-wielding maniac that had just bashed down her door. “Oh no!” the maniac cried, shying away from her intimidating knees. Read more
Friendly and categorised for your enjoyment. Click on the links below to be sped to that section, or scroll through and browse. Misc | Star Trek / Spock / Leonard Nimoy | Doctor Who
It was a fair trade for the immortality God Mode brought her. Now, if only her controller would stop making her jump up and down so much, she might actually decide on a quest... Read more
“So what exactly is a drabble?” asked Galvatron, peering over his minion’s shoulder. “It’s a piece of writing that is exactly 100 words in length.” Replied Starscream, typing contentedly. Read more
It was a fair trade for the immortality God Mode brought her. Now, if only her controller would stop making her jump up and down so much, she might actually decide on a quest... Read more
Within the inky blackness, the bushes stirred in a faint breeze. Even the moon hid behind a thin smokescreen of cloud. A tall figure, clothed in a black swirling cloak and grey robes stopped to get her bearings. Two points of reflective glass glinted in the suffused moonlight. As the moon decided to peek upon the disc, so she quoth “Oh bugger.” Read more
“If ya hadn’t ‘a ducked, it wouldnvvv gone broken. Ss your own fault. Whatrya doin anyway?” Bernard stretched for the nearby whisky bottle. “Work that you seem to be expert at avoiding,” “I knew an expert once. Could sniff out a piece of ham from ten miles away. ‘Ruddy brilliant bloke… Where’d it go?” Read more
"Shaun Micallef, you are hereby reprimanded in our most reprimanding capacity of reprimand, as you should be reprimanded henceforth to remember this reprimand, as we are the reprimanding reprimanders of the reprimanding department of reprimand insanity, a subsidiary of U-Move-It-INK, so we must reprimand you." Read more
He was crossing his fingers so hard that his knuckles went white, was scrunching up his eyes and incessently muttering "Not slytherin, please not slytherin,". When the sorting hat yelled "SLYTHERIN!!" He went more pale then usual and sank down in his chair, eyes full of horror. The girl, however, seemed very happy. Read more
They had decided to go for a day of shopping, having saved their allowence for weeks. Just as they were leaving a shoe store, they were confronted with a group of snooty-looking thugs. "The brunette's hair offends me." Said one of them in a high pitched wail. "The other's legs are too thin for that color socks," Said another, smirking. Read more
Now there is just the beauty of untamed space above, the solidarity of my home underneath. Read more
Tycho was alarmed to see Cyriax wandering into the same turbolift he was going to use. It was too late to change direction without being suspicious, so Tycho hastily shoved the documentary up his shirt and hoped the Commander didnt notice. "Attenborough narrated tubeworms too," Cyriax sadly told Tycho as they went up one level. Read more
“Eh eh eh!” Anne proclaimed, picking up the hydrochloric acid. Carefully she measured 50mls into a beaker, and smashed the rest of the bottle onto the table. Whilst it was slowly melting, she carefully picked up the 50mls of acid and set it down on top of a lit Bunsen burner, that promptly fell over, setting fire to the already melting desk. Read more
Why me? I can’t even brush my teeth without breaking something. This morning I got out of bed as carefully as I could. By the time I had put on my trench coat and pants I had knocked a lamp off my bedside table, put a hole through the ceiling and pulled a curtain off its rungs. Read more
Everything is so different. Just a year ago everything was so tranquil, so riotous and easy to understand. I had honestly believed our little village to be impervious to the impurities and corruption of the greater evil. Read more
Frida lay, prone to the harsh morning light. Eyes screwed shut against the world. Pain from within, light from without. Read more
Then it wasn’t quiet anymore. With an almighty splash, a tiny figure burst from the lakes depths, swearing and ranting at the top of his voice. There was no one save a tone-deaf cormorant flying overhead to hear his colorful language, and as far as the bird was concerned it was merely another human shouting at something. Read more
>> Star Trek / Spock / Leonard Nimoy <<
"This is a most embarrassing topic, Doctor." Spock shifted uncomfortably, trying to ignore McCoys growing smile. "I thought you Vulcans didnt feel human emotions. Embarrassment seems to be rather out of character." Read more
His family camera was a large, ungainly thing, with dark wooden paneling and mysterious mechanisms inside. Leonard let his father load the film; he didn’t want to break the camera as it would be even harder to find a camera than it was to find the film.Read more
You and I, we walked down the beach together. Looking for shells in the half moonlight, straining our eyes through the dim light it shed on the glittering sand. Read more
Closing my eyes, I was surprised to find he was there again. Standing right in the middle of the shifting mass of the dreams that tugged at my human half's subconscious. Read more
"Typical Coke-induced high. Teal'c did that too when he tried to drink the stuff." "Yes, but I wubbled." Teal'c pointed out, eyebrow inching higher. "Nonononon, you should wibble!" said Spock. "To Wibble or Wubble, that is the question!" said the Doctor, pulling a tape measure from his pocket. "I'd rather wobble." said Daniel, wondering if he was ever going to translate the interesting runes he discovered. Read more
“Now, repeat after me. Exterminate!” “Af-ter me.” Alpha obligingly repeated.Read more
Startled, he whipped his hand back with such force he almost toppled onto the grass he had been seeking. Remembering about the mess on his shoe, he thought very carefully whilst shuffling his foot about on the grass. It was all wrong. How could a single person be trapped in a temporal bubble? And why here? Read more
"I love how your electronic eye pulses when you speak, you decomposing hunk of attractive ex-Kaled flesh! Take me!" "Take you where?" Davros was puzzled. His rest quarters seemed as good a place as any to have intimate relations with the Cyberman. Read more
"Despite very nice pants and a nicer bottom and spiffy gun, He is ignored until he has to shout and rant a lot, And then is blamed for the shouting and ranting by that damn time lord" Read more
Wrestling his mind back to the task on hand, he scuttled to the door that led to the dining room. He could hear Jamie's devilishly happy voice booming out some random Scottish song that sounded like he was having a Gaelic fur ball. He shrunk back into the shadows and crept inside. Read more
"So, why do you disturb my slumber dear Lethbridge-Stewart? Has the Doctor buggered off when some nasty blob is trying to eat your troops again? "No, not this time. I just wondered what you thought of my new uniform." Read more
Untangling his once-clean coat from his later selfs mucky hands, he stepped back behind the hexagonal console. "I thought it was fine" He muttered ashamedly. It is most embarrassing to be told off by yourself. "FINE! You mongweed! You forgot to check to organic potential readouts, didnt you?" Read more
Ace realised that she was staring, and that he was just looking puzzledly back at her. Not quite sure what was preventing her tongue from moving, she tried to suffuse the blush that grew on her cheeks. Tough Ace didn't blush. Then again, tought Ace didn't see many time lords in bathrobes. She hadn't seen the Doctor in less than coatless before. Read more
"Wondering what is happening?" He asked, rolling the 'nings' for far too long. "Yes I bleeding well am," The Master replied in what could be described as either saturnine or saturated tones, but the latter would be heinously inaccurate. Read more
With much grunting and effort the squishy pair of invaders painstakingly exited their spaceship. "Were not built for climbing." Yanton pointed out as Zentra slid past. "What exactly are we built for?" Zentra asked as she fell on her back and was unable to rise. "Invading." He answered, landing on his feet and ignoring her windmilling arms. Read more
"Well that washh nice," The Brigadier mumbled, sagging onto the Doctors shoulder so he could stay standing. "Delight-del-it-ful, these humansh." Agreed the Doctor, sagging on the Brigadiers shoulder so they both fell over. "Tell me a stoooooooory!" The Doctor suddenly called out, pulling himself up to sit cross-legged and clapping like a lunatic. "I'm not your ruddy father!" The Brigadier slurred, attempting to stand and failing miserably. "I'll dig up the Silurians!" The Doctor threatened, making digging movements with his hands.Read more
Small men ran about their small tasks below the observation window. Hrethnen, captain of his pirate time ship watched them dart through their lives, giving their days to the cause of money and greed. Read more
Susan Foreman- Grandfather never washed his own underwear. Ian Chesterton- Whenever there was a pool of acid nearby, he'd stick my ruddy tie in it. Read more
The afternoon sun gently warmed Ace's face as she and the Doctor paddled further out onto the lakes calm surface. The small pedal operated boat bobbed slightly as the Doctor sighed and shifted his weight. Read more
The lava, despite its fond dreams of destroying large amounts of helpless confectionary was, in all truth, destroying lots of little buildings and approaching many more little buildings, some of which had people in them. Read more
Buggy: *Twirls scalf more vigerously* Paul: *Over Grouchy's 'old days' speil* "Oh do stop lecturing us, dear Grouchy." Jumpy: *Gets into miniture plane and swoops about the room* Snappey: "UNSTABLE!" *Yells at Paul* "This is as stable as I'll ever be!" *Starts up chainsaw and heads again for the table* Silly: "Oh my giddy aunt!" Read more
He was veigly aware of his clothes turning to ash and floating serenely to the floor. Part of his mind was screaming at him that his skin would soon follow suit. But the Doctor felt nothing. Not calm, or unconsciousness, but eons and eons of collected nothing swamped his mind until there was only one corner left that was the Doctor. And that corner was very, very angry. Read more
"Yes?" she asked, leaning back and revealing her 'Hi, Im Bob' name badge in all of its glory. "Were here to dissuade the Sontaran invasion." The Brigadier said calmly, flashing his U.N.I.T. badge (which, incidentally, gave him concessions to three local Kareoke bars sushi special).Read more
I was a’running down a Scottish dale Aye, was I running quite fast, really Putting one foot in front of the other, I ran Ran, ran ran, och, I ran. Read more
All original characters, settings etc. © me. Any theft of the above stories is unjustifiable. Stories may be reproduced with my express permission, contact me at Dark_Pheonix7@hotmail.com |
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This website is © Nightshade_pheonix, so is the content, layout, assorted sweets and ethanol's boiling point (78 degrees C)
